IFS Therapy — An Evidence-Based Approach To Healing
Internal Family Systems is an effective, evidence-based psychotherapy methodology. It believes that our inner Self is capable of healing the Parts of us that hurt or feel stuck. In IFS, there are no “bad” parts, and each and every part of you is welcome, even the ones that you want to avoid because they are painful or scary.
IFS is not about “fixing” yourself. It’s about embracing and healing the Parts of you that hurt. It involves learning how to live harmoniously with all Parts of you.
IFS also believes that the agent of healing is yourself. You have the power to give yourself relief, healing, and growth—and your IFS therapist can help you access that healing energy.
The ultimate goal of IFS Therapy is to help you explore and understand your internal Parts, cultivate a greater sense of self-awareness, and build a harmonious relationship with your internal system.
The Self and the Multiplicity Of The Mind
We are all born with an inner immutable Self. Our inner Self, some prefer to call it their Inner Light or their Soul, is the “deep ground of our being”. The Self is pure unadulterated compassion, kindness, and acceptance of our being. There are no strings attached, no ulterior motive, nothing you need to achieve — the Self is compassion just because you are. The Self can bring us curiosity, courage, connection, creativity, confidence, and calmness.
On the other hand, we develop Parts throughout our lives. Some Parts are given to us, via intergenerational trauma, while others are developed through our lived experiences. Parts are full-feeling beings, capable of a range of emotions and thoughts.
They all have their own history, background, and preferred ways of being seen and understood. For example, a traumatic experience can create a traumatized Part that feels stuck in the memory and pain of that trauma. Or, we may live with Perfectionist Parts that believe there is absolutely no room for less-than-perfect. Moreover, we may have an Anxious Part that cannot relax, especially in certain situations. Parts can also help us — like a deeply Empathetic Part can help us better understand those around us.
Experiencing a multiplicity of Parts is not a bad or pathological thing. Rather, it’s a very natural part of the human experience, and it happens all the time. Think of a time when you felt conflicted about a decision—for example, what to have for dinner. A part of you wants Korean BBQ, and another part of you wants hamburgers. At that moment, you’ve experienced a multiplicity of the mind.
While living with Parts is natural and can serve you, it can sometimes also work against you. Some Parts may get stuck in unpreferred roles and have an impact on your life that can be challenging or painful.
Parts can even get so stuck that they begin to block our access to our inner Self. If our Parts are too strong or loud, it can cover up our Self, and distance us from that compassionate, kind, warm healing energy. When we can’t access our Self because our Parts are stuck or hurting, instead of kindness and compassion towards ourselves, maybe all we can feel towards ourselves is judgment, criticism, and doubt.
The History And Efficacy Of IFS Therapy
IFS also referred to as Internal Family Systems, was founded by Dick Schwartz in the early 1980s. It has become an accepted form of treatment as more and more people have been experiencing radical change through this approach.
Tenets of IFS have been in our human experience and social consciousness for a long time. For example, the idea of living with Parts of us has long been an accepted part of our language and media. We often say “There’s a part of me that feels…” and the media has long used the “devil and angel on your shoulder” to portray the idea of Parts. Movies like Pixar’s ‘Inside Out’ are also examples in the media about the idea of living with Parts.
When we experience inner turmoil, that’s our inner Parts being unable to find harmonious ways to coexist. When we want to hide away painful memories, that’s our attempt at hiding Painful Parts away from our conscious awareness so we don’t have to sit with that pain. IFS has given form and shape to that innately human experience to provide us with strategies to help us experience healing.
How Can IFS Therapy Benefit Me?
IFS Therapy can be especially beneficial for those who struggle with anxiety, trauma/ PTSD, and sense of Self.
It is also effective in healing difficulties in relationships or understanding what Parts are keeping you stuck in an unpreferred relationship dynamic. During individual therapy, IFS is especially helpful if you struggle to feel internal peace or are feeling dissatisfied with your life.
This modality aims to release heavy burdens and experience healing of the heart and mind.
What Is IFS Therapy And How Does The Process Work?
You were born with a Self. Sometimes we may be present with this Self, while other times, we may feel very far away from it. Though it may feel distant at times, the Self is always there and can never be harmed. IFS Therapy is a journey of getting back to the Self by helping and healing the Parts that are keeping us away from that Self energy.
During sessions, your therapist Ji Eun will work closely with you to identify the Parts of yourself you’d like to work with. These Parts may be traumatized, stuck, or wounded Parts that have developed from your lived experiences.
Once you’ve found those Parts, you’ll begin the journey of helping those Parts heal and release whatever burdens they are carrying. It is common and easy for us to lock away certain Parts because we don’t want to sit with the pain, discomfort, and shame they may bring. Rather than keeping them locked away, Ji Eun will help you build a relationship with these Parts by developing understanding, kindness, curiosity, openness, and compassion towards them. Her goal is to help you release pain and burdens and provide corrective and healing experiences instead. With Ji Eun’s guidance, you’ll go through a process of releasing what no longer serves you, and create a space to invite in new and different experiences.
Throughout this process, we will never forcibly push to go somewhere that your system isn’t ready to go. IFS is a journey that honors your system, and, we will only go where your system permits us to go.
My Background In IFS Therapy
When I first heard about IFS, I quickly dismissed it as 'mumbo jumbo' because that's what it sounded like to me. While the idea of the Self was more palatable to me, the idea that there’s an entire system of Parts living inside of me seemed preposterous, let alone the idea that these Parts live with their own thoughts, ideas, feelings, history, and relationships.
However, as I continued in my own journey of healing and connecting with myself, I realized how much it resonated with my continuously developing understanding of the human experience. We have a Self. And we do live with Parts. I know from personal and professional experience that all of us have an inner Self that can bring healing and relief to other Parts of us that are feeling stuck, hurting, or alone.
As an IFS therapist, my goal is to support you in experiencing inner harmony. Our internal systems can become unbalanced and conflicted because of trauma, attachment injuries, and other painful experiences. When Parts become unbalanced, we can experience inner conflict, turmoil, loss of sense of self, difficulties in interpersonal relationships, and even depression, anxiety, and other mental health symptoms. Different parts can influence one another in harmful and unproductive ways.
IFS therapists support the journey to a harmonious system where all Parts can coexist in connection and collaboration. And when we are able to experience a harmonious internal system, we are then also able to experience harmonious external experiences. I use IFS in my practice, because I have experienced for myself, and witnessed in others, the power of this approach.
Allow Parts Of You To Fully Heal
How you live and experience your life does not have to be determined by the anxiety, traumatic experiences, or inner conflict you battle. IFS can finally help you feel grounded, at peace, and in harmony with yourself.
With Ji Eun at Full Well Therapy, you’ll be guided in internal exploration and connection, reharmonization, and healing for your hurting Parts. Please visit the contact page, or call (619) 320-5298 to schedule a free 15-minute consultation to see how my approach to IFS Therapy can help you heal. A beautiful life of peace, harmony, and compassion lies ahead of you!